It doesn’t matter how many head-stands or downward-dogs you do…unless you harness your sexual energy, you are paddling and paddling towards your higher self with the boat still tied to the shore.
Tantra. Sex… lots of kinky sex…
There are loads of misconceptions about what TANTRA is. Many people in the west (maybe the world) are sex crazy. Thus the excitement over “tantric sex”. But, there is way more to it. It is more than fun games and kinky-ness. I was well aware of this, but didn’t understand what the reality of tantra actually was. So when the opportunity to attend a lecture on the topic at a nearby school came up, I jumped at the chance. It blew my mind. Why? It was 2 hours of incessant, super interesting information. I sat there scribbling notes down like a caffeinated college student. 5 pages! Not all about sex, but mostly. The guru, sat in his wooden chair in front of the room, his long dark hair pulled back in a pony tail… he began and I lost myself in the un-ending wave of his tantric talk…
I must start by saying that I have very little experience with studying tantra. Very little. Which is perhaps why I found the lecture so “stimulating” ;). To simplify I would say that Tantra is made up of 2 main parts. BIG and small. 1) The BIG TANTRA means to find enlightenment through action. It is a HUGE UMBRELLA under which Hatha, Karma, Kundalini, Tantra (the small one), and many other types of yoga fall. These paths are all ways to achieve enlightenment. However because most people are not Mohatma Ghandi or Mother Teresa and most people are just “horny” (to quote the guru), then for the rest of humanity, Tantra yoga is a viable and attractive option. 2) The small Tantra is a practice on the path towards enlightenment through sex. This is what all the tantric commotion is about. The topic is deep. Perhaps never-ending (just like the rest of yoga) but I’m happy to share the OVERVIEW of what I learned here in Rishikesh, India on a Saturday night.
It all starts with BRAHMACHARIA: the 4th Yama. Often defined as celibacy, it is far bigger then this… Dividing the word up between Brahma (creative force) and Charia (master) the definition becomes “master of the creative life force”. For all living beings on earth, sex is the creative life force. (Cover your ears children) We are all created through sex, the uniting of sexual energy. Even flowers come out of sexual energy. We are ALL here as a result of our species own STRONGEST power. Our sexual power…
So then, why the celibacy?
The answer was quite simple. Because sex is our strongest power, this is what we should be using to reach NIRVANA. How? By saving our ojas: Sexual JUICES (yes… juices, the white ones). The teacher claimed that our ojas is responsible for our health, longevity, and immunity… No ojas means no life. Maintained sexual energy is the MOST POWERFUL THING that we have in order to achieve TRANSFORMATION. The claim of eternal damnation by many of the worlds leading religions for engaging in sexual acts was an effort to save people from wasting their ojas. The reason, if we as a species manage to resist the temptations brought on by our powerful sexual desire and save our sexual energy for something else, our artwork, our writing, the worlds betterment, nirvana, then the results are guaranteed to be unbelievable. Collosil spiritual energy will emerge. The guru gave many examples of famous Indian swamis who had practiced celebacy to achieve incredible feats. And Joan of Arc, who was celibate, and at 19 years old had cultivated enough spiritual energy to help lead the French to many victories during The Hundred Years War.
The guru then reiterated that the reaching of the higher self, is simply not possible while leaking the ojas. Which begs the question… Does saving your ojas mean CELEBACY FOR LIFE?! Many readers will have a hard time accepting that unless they save their sexual power, their spiritual practice, regardless of how ardent, is lost. According to the guru there are 2 choices.
1) Celebacy. NO SEX. NONE WHATSOEVER. Not with your left hand. Or your right hand. Not in your mind. NONE.
OR the second option…
2) TANTRIC SEX. The art of Tantra (the small one) is learning how to have sex without losing the ojas. Thus totally TRANSFORMING the sexual power into a blissful state (extending the orgasm as long as possible). The guru stated that the orgasm itself is a mini enlightenment, or a small glimpse of Nirvana. He explained it like this:
“You are at a train station and the train to nirvana is coming, you see it coming (like the coming of an orgasm) the train arrives at full speed and flies by you. Way to fast jump on. Tantra is slowing the train down so that you can get on it.”
Once the orgasim hits 46 min. long…ENLIGHTENMENT IS REACHED! Sounds difficult yeah? It is. That is why a good teacher is required. But it is not impossible. As proof of the power of tantric sex he listed Mae West. A sexual icon of the 20’s, 30’s and 40’s, Mae didn’t start her career until 39 years old… she was seducing men through her 70’s. She claimed to have held onto her youth and vitality, by practicing tantric sex.
Finding Nirvana through sex sounds like every persons dream yeah? The down side? Tantric “relationships” are tough. Very tough. They are based on FREEDOM. While in a tantric relationship it must be totally open and non-commital. To any “wholesome” folk who want to practice “tantric sex” (an oxymoron?) this might hit like a stone. The guru himself claimed that there were many nights he spent crying at the loss of his partner, and his ego. He said that often he felt that simply being celibate would be easier then practicing tantric sex. Ohhhhh…. my heart sank, is there a middle ground for those of us who are not going to live in the Himalayas hoping from partner to partner forever? Is it possible in a committed relationship? According to Pala Copeland and her partner Al Link in the book SOUL SEX:Tantra for Two… We can have EVERYTHING we want… Phew! Nirvana Express! Here I Cum! Lol..